Webb Therapy Uncategorized Suicidality: Talking About Suicide and Support

Suicidality: Talking About Suicide and Support

Supporting someone who’s having thoughts of suicide is one of the most important, and at times most challenging, parts of a support persons role. People who experience suicidality can vary from passing ideas to serious planning and often come from a place of deep emotional pain. We all have a duty to respond with care, compassion, and an attempt to understand the experience in a way that keeps safety at the heart of every conversation.

Firstly, if you or someone you know is having thoughts of suicide, please know that you’re not broken or beyond help. These thoughts often come when emotional pain feels unbearable and we can’t see a way out. But things can shift, and help is available. We may spend much of our time alone, and we can feel alone even in a crowded room, but you are not alone in this. Suicidality is not uncommon.

The Numbers Today

According to the latest figures (ABS, 2023):

Suicide is the leading cause of death for Australians aged 15 to 44.

In 2022, over 3,100 people died by suicide—about 8.6 deaths each day.

Men account for 75% of those deaths, though women attempt suicide more often (but less often fatally).

According to the Black Dog Institute, roughly 65,000 Australians attempt suicide each year, while around 3,200 die by suicide annually.

Rates among Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples are more than double the national average.

People living in rural and remote areas face higher suicide risks due to isolation, limited services, and other pressures.

Why Does the Mind Think About Suicide?

From a humanistic psychology point of view, suicidal thoughts are not signs of illness or failure, they are a deep emotional signal that something in your life or environment needs care, change, or healing.

Each person and living creature on the planet are inherently worthy, with an innate drive to survive, grow, connect, and for humans, find meaning. When life feels full of suffering, such as grief, isolation, trauma, shame, or hopelessness, the mind may start to believe that death is the only way to stop the pain.

In this view, suicidal thoughts are often not about wanting to die—but about wanting the pain to stop.

They arise when:

You feel disconnected from others or from yourself.

You feel stuck in circumstances that seem unchangeable.

You believe your worth or purpose has been lost.

You’re exhausted from holding on or pretending you’re okay.

But the humanistic perspective also holds this powerful truth: you are more than your pain, and within you is a capacity for healing, choice, and change, even if it doesn’t feel like it right now.

Treat Yourself with Compassion, Not Criticism

It’s easy to get caught in a spiral of self-blame. But you are not weak or selfish. You are a human being who is hurting—and just like you wouldn’t shame someone for being in physical pain, you deserve the same care when your pain is emotional.

Ask yourself:

If someone I loved felt this way, what would I want them to know?

Then try to offer yourself the same kindness.

Reach Out – Connection Saves Lives

Talking to someone can ease the intensity of what you’re feeling. You don’t have to explain everything. Just saying, “I’m not okay right now,” is enough to start.

Lifeline 13 11 14

Beyond Blue 1300 22 4636

Suicide Call Back Service: 1300 659 467

Beyond Blue: 1300 22 4636

13YARN (Support for Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander Peoples): 13 92 76

QLifeNational LGBTQIA+ Peer Support and Referral Service: 1800 184 527

Hours: 3pm – Midnight (local time), every day

What they offer: Confidential, non-judgemental, and inclusive support from trained LGBTQIA+ peer workers. They are not a crisis line like Lifeline, but they can support people in distress and connect you with further help if you’re at risk.

How Counselling Can Help: Evidence-Based Approaches

Counsellors and Psychologists don’t rely on guesswork when helping someone who’s feeling suicidal. They use researched strategies to support recovery. Here are a few key approaches:

Collaborative Assessment and Management of Suicidality (CAMS): This method focuses on working together with the person in distress, rather than telling them what to do. It aims reduce suicidal thoughts more effectively than traditional therapy.

Cognitive Behavioural Therapy for Suicide Prevention (CBT-SP): This version of CBT focuses specifically on managing suicidal thoughts by teaching problem-solving and positive thinking strategies.

Dialectical Behaviour Therapy (DBT): Originally designed for people with intense emotions or borderline personality disorder, DBT is now widely used to reduce suicide risk by teaching emotional regulation, mindfulness, and better relationship skills.

Safety Planning: This involves creating a personalised plan for what someone can do when they feel at risk, including who to call, calming strategies, and safe places to go.

Means Restriction Counselling: This involves helping someone reduce their access to anything they might use to harm themselves, like certain medications or weapons, done through sensitive, respectful conversations.

Barriers to Speaking Up

Even with growing public awareness, there’s still a strong stigma around suicide. Many people worry they’ll be judged, locked up, or shamed if they admit they’re struggling. These fears can stop people from reaching out for help, which is why creating a safe, non-judgmental space is so important in counselling.


Rural and Remote Communities

People in regional and remote parts of Australia often find it harder to access mental health support. Telehealth (online or phone sessions) has helped bridge that gap, but it’s not always easy to pick up on non-verbal cues or respond to crises from a distance.


Cultural Awareness Matters

For Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples, suicide cannot be separated from the impacts of colonisation, loss of culture, and ongoing trauma. Culturally safe, community-led solutions are essential and more effective in these contexts.

Remember That Feelings Change—Even the Darkest Ones

It may not feel like it right now, but these feelings will pass. Emotions are like waves—sometimes crashing, sometimes calm—but never permanent.

What you feel today is not a life sentence. With support and time, things can change. You deserve the chance to see what healing and hope feel like.

Safe Haven NSW Services (for suicidal distress, NOT EDs)

Safe Havens are calm, non-clinical spaces where you can talk with peer workers and mental health clinicians if you’re in emotional crisis — no appointment needed.

No police or emergency involvement unless requested or necessary.

Warm, trauma-informed and recovery-focused.

🔗Find your local Safe Haven: nsw.gov.au/mental-health-initiatives/safe-haven

Examples:

Safe Haven locations across NSW — these are welcoming, non-clinical places where anyone feeling suicidal or in deep distress can drop in and speak to peer workers or mental health clinicians. No appointment, referral, or Medicare card needed. Visit the following for operating hours and locations across NSW: Safe Haven


Regional & Metro Locations

Campbelltown / Ambarvale (SWSLHD)

Address: 80 Woodhouse Drive, Ambarvale (Campbelltown area)

Open Mon, Fri, Sat, Sun 2 – 9 pm

Phone: 0457 093 109 during hours swslhd.health.nsw.gov.au

North Ryde (Macquarie Hospital)

For youth aged 12–17 (sometimes to 18 if still at school)

Open daily 4 – 8 pm and public holidays nslhd.health.nsw.gov.au

Parramatta / Westmead

Drop-in at 26 Grand Ave, Westmead

Open Sun–Wed 3:30 – 9:30 pm

Phone: 0436 377 113

Bega Safe Haven, Bega, NSW, Australia, Supports 14 + in a calm, welcoming space.

Broken Hill Safe Haven, Broken Hill, NSW, Australia, Supports 17 + with peer and clinician support 

Brookvale Safe Haven, Brookvale, NSW, Australia, High‑school aged young people support

Darlinghurst Safe Haven,

Darlinghurst, NSW, Australia, 16 + LGBTQIA+ inclusive spot at St Vincent’s

St Vincent’s O’Brien Centre, 390 Victoria Street, Darlinghurst NSW 2010

Hours: Monday: closed, Tuesday: closed, Wednesday: 5:00pm – 8:30pm​, Thursday: 5:00pm – 8:30pm, Friday: 5:00pm – 8:30pm, Saturday: 12:00pm – 4:00pm, Sunday: 12:00pm – 4:00pm​.

Gosford Safe Haven, General adult Safe Haven

Corner of Ambulance Road and Holden Street, Gosford NSW 2250

Hours: Monday: 9:00am – 4:30pm, Tuesday: 9:00am – 4:30pm, Wednesday: 9:00am – 4:30pm, Thursday: 9:00am – 4:30pm, Friday: 9:00am – 4:30pm, Saturday: closed, Sunday: closed, Closed on public holidays

Phone: (02) 4394 1597​​

Kogarah Safe Haven, Kogarah, NSW, Australia,16 + adults,

U2/15 Kensington St, Kogarah NSW 2217

Phone: (02) 9113 2981

Related Post

The continued differential treatment of mental illness and addiction compared to physical illness by broader society is rooted in several factors:The continued differential treatment of mental illness and addiction compared to physical illness by broader society is rooted in several factors:

Historical Context

Historically, mental illness and addiction have been misunderstood and stigmatized. For much of history, these conditions were seen as moral failings or character flaws rather than medical issues. This has led to a persistent stigma that continues to influence societal attitudes.

Lack of Awareness and Education

There is still a significant lack of awareness and education about mental health and addiction. Many people do not understand that these conditions are medical issues that require treatment, just like physical illnesses. This lack of understanding contributes to negative attitudes and discrimination.

Media Representation

Media often portrays mental illness and addiction in a negative light, reinforcing stereotypes and misconceptions. These portrayals can shape public perception and contribute to the stigma surrounding these conditions.

Criminalization

Addiction, in particular, has been heavily criminalised. This has led to a perception of addiction as a criminal issue rather than a health issue, further entrenching stigma and discrimination.

Internalised Stigma

Individuals with mental illness or addiction often internalise the stigma they experience, leading to feelings of shame and low self-worth. This can prevent them from seeking help and support, perpetuating the cycle of stigma and discrimination.

Healthcare System

Even within the healthcare system, biases and stigma can affect the quality of care provided to individuals with mental illness or addiction. This can lead to inadequate treatment and support, further exacerbating the issue.

Social and Cultural Factors

Social and cultural factors also play a role in how mental illness and addiction are perceived. Different cultures have varying attitudes towards these conditions, which can influence how they are treated and supported.

The differential treatment of treatment-resistant substance use disorder (SUD) and treatment-resistant cancer by society can be attributed to several factors:

1. Perception of Control

Substance use disorders are often perceived as a result of personal choices or moral failings, whereas cancer is seen as an uncontrollable disease. This perception leads to stigma and blame towards individuals with SUD, while those with cancer are more likely to receive sympathy and support.

2. Historical Stigma

Historically, substance use has been stigmatised and criminalised, leading to a societal view that addiction is a choice rather than a medical condition. In contrast, cancer has been recognized as a medical condition requiring treatment and compassion.

3. Media Representation

Media often portrays substance use in a negative light, emphasising criminality and moral failure. Cancer, on the other hand, is often depicted with empathy and urgency, highlighting the need for medical intervention and support.

4. Healthcare System

The healthcare system has historically been more equipped to handle cancer treatment, with extensive research, funding, and specialized care. SUD treatment has lagged behind, with fewer resources and less comprehensive care options.

5. Complexity of Treatment

Treatment-resistant SUD involves complex psychological, social, and biological factors, making it challenging to treat effectively. Cancer treatment resistance, while also complex, has seen significant advancements in research and technology, leading to more effective treatments.

6. Social and Cultural Factors

Cultural attitudes towards substance use and addiction vary widely, with some societies viewing it as a personal failing. Cancer is generally viewed more universally as a disease that requires medical intervention.

REFERENCES

Substance Use Disorder and Stigma

Australian Government Department of Health and Aged Care. (2024). Initiatives and programs. Retrieved from https://www.health.gov.au/about-us/what-we-do/initiatives-and-programs

Morrison, A. P., Birchwood, M., Pyle, M., Flach, C., Stewart, S. L. K., Byrne, R., Patterson, P., Jones, P. B., Fowler, D., & Gumley, A. I. (2013). Impact of cognitive therapy on internalised stigma in people with at-risk mental states. The British Journal of Psychiatry, 203(2), 140-145. https://doi.org/10.1192/bjp.bp.112.112110

Wood, L., Byrne, R., Burke, E., Enache, G., & Morrison, A. P. (2017). The impact of stigma on emotional distress and recovery from psychosis: The mediatory role of internalised shame and self-esteem. Retrieved from https://repository.essex.ac.uk/21927/1/woodpr2017.pdf

Cancer Treatment and Stigma

American Cancer Society. (2023). Cancer treatment and survivorship. Retrieved from https://www.cancer.org/treatment/treatments-and-side-effects.html

National Cancer Institute. (2022). Cancer treatment (PDQ)–Patient version. Retrieved from https://www.cancer.gov/types/treatment-pdq/patient/cancer-treatment-pdq

World Health Organization. (2021). Cancer treatment and palliative care. Retrieved from https://www.who.int/cancer/prevention/diagnosis-screening/cancer-treatment-palliative-care/en/

The phrase “Say what you mean, but don’t say it mean” is all about the balance between honesty and kindness in communication.

Here’s what it means:

  • “Say what you mean”:
    Be clear and truthful. Express your real thoughts and feelings. Don’t beat around the bush or pretend to agree when you don’t.
  • “But don’t say it mean”:
    Speak with kindness and respect. Even when you’re being honest or giving criticism, there’s no need to be rude, hurtful, or aggressive.

Why it matters:

This phrase promotes healthy communication. It’s a reminder that:

  • You can be honest without being harsh.
  • Tone and delivery matter just as much as the words.
  • Empathy and respect should guide your conversations—even when it’s hard.